One of my dearest chicest most faithful friends got married this past weekend. It was a beautiful wedding. But I’m not here to share the wedding details. Okay, I’ll share a few, but I wanted to write, instead, about friendship. Specifically female friendship.
As women, there aren’t too many topics off limit over the course of a friendship. I’ll spend 2 hours at dinner with a girlfriend and we will know what each other ate for breakfast, who our first crush was and whether or not we’re worried about our kid’s affinity for pickles/ impulse control. Mark and his buddies will know where everyone watched the World Cup.
So back to friendship. When I met Elizabeth, I was a young pup in my 20s with not a clue in the world. Preoccupied with things like how white my teeth were, whether or not I should have laser hair removal and how I would find storage in my basement apartment for all of my jackets. She had three beautiful children, a booming writing career, a house, a husband…oh, and beauty that is sort of distracting if we’re being honest. Her children were older and I was single so we logged far too many evenings laughing and sharing and comforting and supporting each other with either an apple martini or a white wine or the occasional tropical fruity cocktail. We propped each other up through heartbreak and divorce, milestones and accomplishments. As female friendships tend to be, it was teetering on the edge of codependence!
Fast forward almost 20 years and I have the rare gift of being able to toast my friend at her wedding. I was struck by the influence that this women has subconsciously had on my life. Which is something we don’t always realize about our friends, but of course it’s true for all of us! We rub off on each other and unknowingly shape each others goals and dreams and ideals.
What is friendship without admiration, reverence, and learning from each other? 24 year old Charlotte met this incredible person who was balancing her children, her career, her friendships and her femininity. These were distinct quadrants of Elizabeth’s person and illuminating for me as I cautiously set my sites on the more distant future.
As women, we are SO easily pigeon holed as moms who spend all our time doting on children. Or tough career women with intellect and confidence. Or beauty queens with good looks and killer physique. Or wives who put dinner on the table and fold the laundry. But all of us women know these pigeon holes are an aberration. A unicorn. Diet donuts. They don’t exist.
I am forever grateful that the universe brought my dear friend Elizabeth into my world as an example of how to believe in and nurture so many facets of female character. Laughing with my kids, working late nights on the blog, putting on a swipe of mascara in the morning, and hitting up a Broadway show with Mark… 20 years of friendship has a little part in each of those things.
Oh, and accessories. She played a BIG role in my love for killer accessories.
Elizabeth’s on a beach somewhere without me, but you bet your fanny I’m toasting her with some froofy cocktail and counting the days until we can spend a couple of hours rehashing the whole grand event! Because that’s what friends are for!
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